If you guys have read a previous post of mine (also linked here), I talked about my struggle with self-confidence and how I am trying to overcome it. Today I’m going to talk about something along the same lines: feeling lonely.
As mentioned in the other post, I used to change myself for every person that I met, every friend that I made, none of them being the real me. This caused me, inside, to feel very lonely. I just had my family and that was about it. Because nobody knew the real me, it became nearly impossible to tell others anything.
Over time, all of my friends found their own friends, true friends. They still talked to me, but I was just a regular person in their lives. Every day after school, I would see my friends just walk past me, forgetting about me, and running after their other friends. I was just expected to follow, like always. I was the odd one out in every single friend group that I had. This really started affecting me, it still does.
How do I deal with this? My family. I am beyond grateful for the extended families that live right near me. They value me for who I am. Every minute I spend with them, no matter how boring it might be, I never feel left out. I never feel like I would be better off doing something else than being there. Though I might have been bored a lot, I was never alone. Spending time with family, truly helped me, because I found a place I was valued, a place where my voice is heard, a place where I wasn’t taken for granted.
To those who feel the same way I do. Who feel lonely and as though they don’t have anyone to be with. Always remember: no matter who stays and leaves in your life, there will always be family behind you. To catch you when you fall, and push you back higher. As a shoulder to cry on, a friend to laugh with. Never take family for granted.
Akshara Akella 